Family pic

Family pic

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Our Soon-to-be-Kindergartener


Anagrace is officially registered for kindergarten! One paper in the registration packet had questions that focused on her personality and learning style. This posed a challenge to me because she is a lot like me in that she has personality traits that seem to change according to mood or circumstance....shy or outgoing...leader or follower...independent or dependent...stubborn or compliant...it just depends. These words and other adjectives were scattered randomly on a section of the paper. I circled the ones that seemed fairly consistent with her: sympathetic, friendly, fearful, helpful, and happy. There was also a section that I could add more to describe her so I wrote "she is the oldest of three and the only girl", and those facts of life have definately shaped her personality. I didn't write the following, but that paper made be think about my soon-to-be Kindergartener:
Being a big sister has made her helpful and increased her compassion. She has certain traits that are characteristic of the first born: she is picky and precise, likes to be in control and doesn't like surprises, can sometimes be a "know-it-all", often bossy and feels that she is right, responsible and tries to keep the rules and will misbehave if rejected, and she tries to please others.

Parenting her, a firstborn, I know that I need to be careful in what I expect from her. I can be a perfectionist, and I see that in her too. I don't ever want her to feel like she cannot live up to my ideals. I need to try really hard not to "fix" things that she has done. I need to praise her in all of her attempts and try to minimize the pressure she puts on herself. I need to not demand so much from her and expect her to behave older than her age. I must remember that she is still only five. I need to make sure to devote one-on-one time with her. I spend so much time and energy with the boys, but I need to set aside some "girly time" for my only girl. I can see so much of myself in her. And I know she watches me. I want to be a better mother for her. She challenges me and she is helping me to grow, just as I am trying to do the same for her.

3 comments:

Erin said...

Oh, she is so precious...just like her mommy :) See ya soon!
E

K said...

My firstborn has a lot of the same qualities you describe (of course, he's a boy). It's exciting to think of them going to kindergarten, but I know I will be an emotional wreck. Thankfully, I've got a bit more time.

The Haiglers said...

Chelsea you are a wonderful mother. Just in how you describe how you want to be with her, I know you are accomplishing more than you know. God blessed your children to have you as a mother.